Crockpot Egg Roll in a Bowl: The Lazy Person’s Takeout

Let’s be honest: when we order egg rolls, we’re all just tolerating the wrapper to get to the good stuff inside. Sure, the crunch is nice, but the savory, salty, ginger-spiked filling is where the magic happens. Also, deep-frying things at home is a nightmare. The oil splatters, the house smells like a fast-food joint for three days, and the cleanup is a tragedy.

So you’re craving that takeout flavor but are too lazy to wrap tiny burritos and fry them? Same.

This recipe is affectionately known as “Egg Roll in a Bowl” (or “Crack Slaw” on the internet, because it’s addictive, but let’s stick to the professional name). It takes all the flavors you love—pork, cabbage, soy, garlic—and throws them into a slow cooker so you can binge-watch your favorite show while dinner makes itself.

Why This Recipe is Awesome

First off, this is a volume-eater’s dream. You can eat a massive bowl of this stuff without unbuttoning your pants because it’s mostly cabbage. It’s low-carb, keto-friendly (if you care about that), and incredibly cheap to make.

It’s also virtually idiot-proof. The hardest part involves browning meat, which I have faith you can do. The slow cooker breaks down the cabbage until it’s tender but not mushy, absorbing all those delicious juices. It’s basically a deconstructed egg roll that requires zero dexterity.

• Course: Dinner / Meal Prep Champion
• Cuisine: Asian-ish / Fusion
• Difficulty: Easiest thing you’ll cook this month
• Servings: 4–6 (Prepare for leftovers)
• Prep time: 15 minutes
• Cooking time: 2–3 hours
• Calories: surprisingly low (approx. 300 per bowl)
• Total time: ~3 hours

Ingredients You’ll Need

We are keeping this simple. The goal is maximum flavor with minimum effort.

• Ground Pork: 1 lb. This is the traditional egg roll meat. It has fat, which equals flavor. You can use ground turkey or chicken if you want to be “healthy,” but pork is king here.
• Coleslaw Mix: 1 large bag (14-16 oz). Do not chop your own cabbage. Why would you do that? Buy the pre-shredded bag with the carrots in it. It costs like two dollars and saves you twenty minutes.
• Onion: 1 small white or yellow onion, diced.
• Garlic: 3–4 cloves, minced. Measure with your heart. If you want to use the jarred stuff, I won’t tell anyone.
• Ginger: 1 tablespoon fresh grated (or the squeeze tube paste). Ground ginger works in a pinch, but fresh brings the zing.
• Soy Sauce: ½ cup. Use low-sodium so you don’t turn into a salt lick.
• Sriracha: 1 tablespoon (or more). You need a little kick to wake up the pork.
• Sesame Oil: 1 teaspoon. This is the potent stuff that makes it smell like real takeout.
• Chicken Broth: ¼ cup. Just a splash to create steam.
• Garnishes: Green onions and sesame seeds. Essential for making it look like you tried.

Step-by-Step Instructions

1. The Brown-Town Express: Heat a skillet over medium-high heat. Toss in your ground pork and diced onion. Cook until the pork is browned and the onions are soft. Do not skip this. Putting raw ground meat directly into a slow cooker results in a weird, boiled texture that nobody wants.
2. Drain the Grease: Once browned, drain off most of the excess fat. Leave a little bit for flavor, but you don’t want your bowl to be an oil slick.
3. The Dump: Transfer the cooked pork mixture into the bottom of your Crockpot.
4. The Sauce: In a small bowl (or just directly in the pot if you hate dirty dishes), whisk together the soy sauce, garlic, ginger, Sriracha, sesame oil, and chicken broth. Pour this glory over the pork.
5. The Veggies: Dump the entire bag of coleslaw mix on top. It will look like too much cabbage. It’s not. It shrinks down significantly, like my motivation on a Monday morning.
6. The Cook: Cover and cook on LOW for 2–3 hours or HIGH for 1.5–2 hours.
7. The Mix: When the cabbage is tender but still has a slight bite, stir everything together so the cabbage gets coated in the sauce.
8. The Finish: Taste it. Does it need more soy sauce? More heat? Adjust it. Serve hot, topped with sliced green onions and sesame seeds. Drizzle with a little extra spicy mayo if you’re feeling dangerous.

Common Mistakes to Avoid

This is a forgiving recipe, but there are a few ways to ruin the vibe.

• Overcooking the Cabbage: If you leave this in the Crockpot for 8 hours while you go to work, you will come home to brown mush. Cabbage releases water. Overcooked cabbage smells… distinctive. Check it at the 2-hour mark.
• Adding Too Much Liquid: Do not add cups of water or broth. The cabbage releases a ton of liquid as it cooks. If you add too much at the start, you’re making soup, not a stir-fry substitute.
• Using Lean Meat with No Seasoning: If you use 99% lean ground turkey, you need to double down on the spices and sesame oil. Fat carries flavor; without it, things get bland fast (IMO).
• Skipping the Garnish: Without the green onions and sesame seeds, this dish looks very beige. We eat with our eyes first, so dress it up.

Alternatives & Substitutions

Customize this bowl to fit your fridge situation:

• Make it Vegetarian: Swap the pork for crumbled tofu, edamame, or meat-free crumbles. Use vegetable broth instead of chicken. It’s still delicious.
• Gluten-Free: Traditional soy sauce contains wheat. If you are gluten-sensitive, swap it for Tamari or Coconut Aminos.
• The “Egg” Addition: Want to really mimic the egg roll? Scramble two eggs in a separate pan and stir them into the bowl right before serving. It adds great texture.
• Spicy Noodles: Boil some ramen noodles (ditch the packet) and stir them in at the end. Now you have Lo Mein. You’re welcome.

FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions)

Can I freeze this?

Technically, yes. However, cabbage releases a lot of water when thawed, so the texture might be a bit softer upon reheating. It’s better fresh or from the fridge.

Is this actually healthy?

Compared to a deep-fried egg roll dipped in sugary duck sauce? Absolutely. It’s high-protein and loaded with fiber.

Can I use red cabbage?

You can, but just be aware that it will dye your meat and the entire dish a weird shade of purple-grey. If you don’t mind eating purple meat, go for it.

I forgot to buy fresh ginger. Now what?

Use dried ground ginger. The ratio is usually 1/4 teaspoon ground for every 1 tablespoon fresh. It won’t be quite as zesty, but it works.

Can I make this on the stove instead?

Yes! If you don’t want to wait 2 hours, just brown the meat in a large wok/skillet, add the sauce and cabbage, and sauté for 5–7 minutes until the cabbage wilts. Same taste, faster speed.

What do I serve this with?

It’s a meal on its own! But if you want to bulk it up, serve it over white rice or cauliflower rice.

Final Thoughts

There you have it. All the flavor of your favorite Chinese appetizer with none of the guilt, grease, or delivery fees. This Crockpot Egg Roll in a Bowl is the ultimate “I have no energy” dinner that still tastes like you put in some effort.

Now go impress someone—or yourself—with your new culinary skills. Grab a fork (or chopsticks if you’re feeling fancy) and dig in. You’ve earned it!